As you know, Mel Gibson pretty much crucified his career with the volley of imbecilic prejudices he let fly when he was arrested for driving under the influence of tequila.
As soon as he regained his sobriety, a repentant Mr. Gibson stated, "I've considered the idiotic things I said and realize my brain is hopeless. Not only has it prompted me to make moronically insensitive movies; now it has allowed me to say disgracefully stupid things. So, to save myself and the rest of the world from anymore of its dumb activities, I've decided to have it removed."
The doctor who performed the surgery commented, "The procedure was easier than I anticipated. Mel's brain was so small all I had to do was roll him on his side and it fell out of his ear."
After the surgery, Mr. Gibson was sitting up in bed, smiling in angelic silence. He had obviously been freed from the complexities of a world that is beyond his mental competence.
When a reporter asked how he felt now that he no longer had a brain, Gibson simply continued to smile and, most astonishingly of all, not a word emanated from his now blissfully untroubled aspect.
His physician, eager to point out the improvement, exclaimed, "See? Silence! Now that's what I call a miracle."
Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway. Critics have called his writing "delightfully funny," "witty," with "great humor and ebullience" and "good, genuine laughs." |
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